


you're the closest to heaven that i'll ever be

by magequisition



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, College AU, M/M, coffee shop AU, librarian!cas, undergrad!dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-27
Updated: 2012-12-05
Packaged: 2017-11-17 03:23:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/547101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magequisition/pseuds/magequisition
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Undergrad Dean Winchester is feeling pretty comfortable with his life. He's in his last semester of college, is starting to fill out grad school applications, and has a comfortable enough job at the campus coffee shop. He's not looking to date anyone, but when an eccentric guy in a trenchcoat comes into the shop during Dean's shift one day, he suddenly finds himself oddly distracted.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

            Dean glanced up from his textbook and did a quick double take as the fluorescent numbers of his alarm clock flashed angrily at him.

            "Crap," he said, jumping up quickly and grabbing his jacket, shoving his arms into the sleeves as he ran out of his dorm room.

*****

            "Dean. Nice of you to show up," his boss, Bobby, said, a bored tone to his voice.

            "Sorry, Bobby, seriously. Besides, I'm only six minutes late." Dean replied.

            "Yeah, yeah. Grab yer apron and get on the till, will ya? The new kid's drivin' me crazy, let him leave." Bobby's voice was gruff as always, but his eyes lit up with a flash of clear humour. Dean finished tying the black apron around his waist and headed into the storefront, tapping the shoulder of the freshman standing at the counter.

            "Hey, Benny. Sorry I'm late. You can take off."

            "Thanks, man. I'm desperate to get out of here. Catch ya later," he said, turning around and leaving, clearing the space in front of the till for Dean, and pulling off his apron before he was even fully out of the storefront. Dean rolled his eyes.

            "Yeah, later."  He glanced around the empty storefront and turned to make sure there was enough fresh coffee brewed. He'd just pulled out a filter to brew a new pot of the dark roast coffee, realising as soon as he looked into the pot that Benny had screwed up again and it was full of grounds, when he heard the little bell over the door ring. He glanced over his shoulder and caught sight of a slightly baffled-looking guy in a trenchcoat walking in.

            "Hey, I'll be with you in just a sec," Dean said over his shoulder, turning back to quickly scoop coffee grounds into the filter and turn the machine on. Brushing his hands on his apron, he turned back to the till, jumping slightly when he realised how close to the counter the other man was standing.

            "Uh, hey. What can I get for you?" he asked.

            "I'm…not exactly certain." The other man's voice was deep and slightly raspy, and he was staring at the menu as though he'd never been to a coffee shop before. "What would you recommend?"

            Dean looked at him carefully for a minute. Trenchcoat covering a shirt and tie-interesting combination. Slightly eccentric type, he assumed. _Really cute, though…_ he thought before he could stop himself. Shaking his head slightly to clear that thought - the last thing he needed right now was to be attracted to someone, not on the eve of midterms in his last semester of undergrad - he figured the guy for a tea type. He definitely didn't look like he needed an espresso buzz.

            "Well, I'm not one hundred percent sure what kind of thing you like, but we've got a pretty good selection of different teas," Dean said, holding up the little card that listed the shop's assortment of tea. Trenchcoat (as Dean had decided to refer to him in his head) took it silently and looked at it thoughtfully.

            "Yes, I like tea. I think I would like the…" he paused, considering the options. "The vanilla black tea, please."

            "Yeah, no problem. That one's good. I'm usually a coffee guy, but I drink tea when I'm sick," he said conversationally as he punched the code for tea into the till. "That'll be $2.15. You want it in a mug, or are you taking it with you?" he asked, slipping the money into the till when the other man handed it to him.

            "Regrettably, I must go immediately. I have a meeting."

            "You've got it. It'll be just a minute," Dean said, turning and slipping a sleeve onto the cardboard cup. He dropped the tea bag in, holding the string with his thumb, and quickly filled it with hot water from the machine by the sink. Attaching a lid to the top, he brought it back to the counter and slid it across.

            "Here ya go. There's milk and sugar on the little counter over there," he pointed, "if you want anything in it."

            "Thank you. I will be fine without anything in it. I appreciate your assistance in choosing my drink."

            "Hey, anytime. I hope you like the tea. Maybe I'll see you around sometime."

            "Yes, if you work frequently I believe you will see me…around, again." With that, the odd man turned and left the shop, moving with a kind of quick grace that made him seem to vanish. Dean blinked, taken slightly aback by the speed of the odd man's departure, and then grinned, leaning down to grab the plastic package of lids before moving to restock them.

*****

            The rest of Dean's shift passed quickly as the late-afternoon crowd, desperate for a caffeine rush to fuel their evening midterms-induced cram sessions, streamed steadily through the coffee shop. As the crowd began to thin out around six o'clock, Bobby came out to the storefront.

            "Hey, Dean, I'll cover the last two hours. It'll be pretty quiet from here on out, and I know you've got exams and stuff."

            "Nah, Bobby, it's okay. Really. I can stick around."

            "Dean, I'm lettin' ya off early. And I'll even pay ya for your full shift. Now get outta here…idjit." Dean grinned.

            "Thanks, Bobby."

            "No problem. Get outta here before I change my mind." Dean flashed the older man a mock salute before heading into the back room to stash his apron. Bobby was strange sometimes - and for the life of him Dean couldn't figure out how he came to run a coffee shop - but he was a good guy. Dean grabbed his jacket and headed out the front door, waving to Bobby as he left. He decided to go back to his room and grab his books, then go to the library to study for awhile. His roommate was a nice enough, but not overly concerned about his exams and he had a tendency to watch the TV really, really loudly.

            Dean arrived at the library half an hour later, backpack slung lazily over one shoulder as he walked around, looking for a free table to study at and frustrated at the unsurprising lack of free seats. He swung around a corner quickly, hoping that this would be the area with a free table, and crashed into someone.

            "Oh, crap, sorry. Wasn't looking." Dean said, glancing up and finding a pair of oddly familiar blue eyes looking back at him.

            "It's alright. We were both travelling around the corner at the same time. It is as much my fault as it is yours," the raspy voice responded.

            "Oh, it's - it's you. I, uh, don't worry about it. Hey." Dean smiled. "How'd you like the tea?"

            "It was very enjoyable. Thank you. I believe I will return tomorrow to have more. Although, perhaps this time I will remain in the shop. It was quite nice there, and I have no meetings tomorrow. Will you be working tomorrow?" Dean blinked.

            "Yeah. Uh, I mean, I work almost every day. Usually in the afternoon, since I have classes in the mornings. What about you? What's your major?" Dean asked, strangely curious about this person he'd met only once. A small half-smile quirked the corner of the other man's mouth as he gestured to the small pin on his chest.

            _Librarian_ , it read. _I'm here to help!_

            "Oh, crap. I didn't even notice. Well, sorry about that. You looked younger than that."

            "It is not a problem," he responded. Dean shifted uncomfortably for a second, feeling like he should say something else, but unsure what was appropriate, since he was no longer certain asking the guy - whose name he didn't even know - if he wanted to hang out was acceptable.

            "Well, uh, I'd better run. I'm looking for somewhere to study. Organic Chem midterm in two days." Dean said quickly, eager to fill the silence and widen the gap between himself and the librarian, who seemed to have little concept of personal space.

            "Very well. I noticed a table back that way," the man said, gesturing behind him slightly, in the direction Dean had been headed when they collided.

            "Thanks," Dean said gratefully.

            "Well, I am…here to help," he said, voice deadpan but that half-smile teasing at the corners of his mouth again. Dean grinned widely.

            "'Course you are," he said. "And I'm here to make you tea. Well, at the coffee shop. I don't actually have…" he trailed off, realising he was babbling, and felt his cheeks redden slightly. _Jesus, Dean,_ he thought to himself. _You haven't had this much trouble talking to a person in…ever. Get it together._ "I'll uh, see you around. Maybe at the shop tomorrow?" he said quickly, trying to regain his composure.

            "I will certainly be there tomorrow. I will finish my shift in the library at four o'clock, and I will come afterwards, if you will still be working."

            "Yeah. I work until eight tomorrow, I’m closing up the shop. So…I guess…I'll see you tomorrow?" he said, not sure why he'd turned it into a question.

            "I am looking forward to seeing you. Perhaps I will investigate one of your other tea offerings. Good luck with your studying." The man - Dean was really going to have to ask his name tomorrow - inclined his head slightly and continued walking past Dean, who stood rooted in place for a minute, still trying to wrap his mind around what had just happened and why he was so excited to get to work the next afternoon.


	2. Chapter 2

_"What's gotten into you, dude?"_

            "Nothin', Sammy. I gotta go, my shift's about to start." Dean said into his phone.

            _"I'll talk to you later."_

            "Yeah, okay. Later." Dean ended the call, slipping his phone into his pocket as he entered the coffee shop. He loved his younger brother, but man was he ever nosy sometimes. He'd gotten it into his head that Dean was distracted - and maybe he was - but so what? He had midterms starting. He had every reason to be distracted. He slid the neck loop of his apron over his head and tied it quickly behind his waist before stepping into the front of the shop.  A line had formed since he entered, so Dean made his way to the espresso bar, grabbing the first cup in the line Bobby had started and began to fill orders.

            The first hour of Dean's shift passed quickly as he made drink after drink. Finally, he reached the last cup in the line.

            "The line's out, Dean. I gotta head into the office and take care of a few things. Shout if ya get another rush."

            "Sure, Bobby. Thanks." Dean said as he passed the last drink over the counter.

            "See you tomorrow," he said to the smiling girl, who was in every day. She waved as she turned and headed for the door. Breathing a sigh of relief at the lull, Dean grabbed a cloth and turned to wipe the spilled espresso grounds off the back counter, bobbing his head slightly to the  music in the shop as he cleaned up the mess.

            "Excuse me," the low voice startled him out of his distracted cleaning, causing him to whirl around and drop his cloth to the floor.

            "Woah! Sorry. The bell didn't-I didn't hear you come in." It was the librarian again. Dean smacked himself mentally at his stammering.

            "I entered at the same time as the last customer left. You must have simply heard the bell and thought it was her exiting. It isn't a problem."

            "Thanks. So, ah, what can I get for you today?" Dean asked him, quickly wiping his hands on his apron and stepping closer to the till.

            "I have been examining your tea list again. I believe that today I would like to try the chocolate mint truffle tea. I will stay here with it this time." His gravelly voice held a note of pleasure in it, as though he was proud of himself for coming to the decision on his own.

            "Good choice," Dean said, ringing in the tea. Handing the other man back his change, he added,

            "Hey. What's your name? If you want, you can go find yourself somewhere to sit, and I can call you when it's ready or bring it over to you." He noticed the librarian's lips quirk slightly in a small smile as he suggested it.

            "I am Cas," he said. "Thank you….Dean," he said, looking carefully at the name embroidered on Dean's apron.

            Dean grinned at the sound of the librarian - Cas - saying his name. He liked the way he seemed to think about it before he spoke.

            "Nice to meet you, Cas. Go find somewhere to sit. I'll bring your tea out in a minute, when it's ready," he said, tipping his head to indicate the seating area full of mismatched comfortable chairs as well as small tables with more practical chairs for studying at. Cas inclined his head and moved away from the counter. Dean paused a minute longer than necessary, watching the other man walk away before going to grab the required teabag and mug.

*****

            A few minutes later, Dean found Cas sitting in one of the overstuffed armchairs, one leg curled up underneath him, already engrossed in a novel.

            "Hey, Cas. Here's your tea." Dean said quietly, trying not to startle the other man as he set his tea down on the small table beside the chair.  Cas looked up and smiled. It was a bigger, more enthusiastic smile than Dean had yet seen from him.

            "Thank you, Dean." he said. "I am looking forward to trying this tea. The last one I tried here was quite enjoyable."

            "Hey…no problem. Let me know if there's anything else I can do for you." Dean said, grinning as he stepped back slightly. He paused, not especially wanting to go back to the empty counter but lacking anything else to say. An awkward silence fell between the two as Dean stood there, shifting slightly before coughing lightly.

            "Well. Okay. Enjoy your tea, Cas. I'm gonna go get back to work." He spun quickly on his toes and retreated back to the counter, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. As he washed out an empty coffee pot and started brewing a new pot of decaf, he couldn't help but think to himself how much bluer Cas' eyes seemed when he smiled like that.

            _Damn it, Dean, not now._ He thought, as soon as the observation had passed through his mind. _This shit never ends well._

*****

            The shop had been more or less empty for about an hour, with only one tired student drifting in and getting a coffee to go and only an hour left until closing, so Dean decided to take advantage of the quiet. Reaching around the corner into the back room, he grabbed a textbook from his bag and sat down at the small table directly next to the counter, giving himself a chance to study while still keeping an eye on the door. As he looked at the list of chemical formulas, reciting them in his head, he felt his eyes start to drift closed.

            _Ugh, stay awake, stay awake._ He thought to himself. Clenching his hands into fists he ground them into his eyes before shaking his head slightly and getting up to pour himself a cup of coffee. _Get yourself through this exam tomorrow, and then you can sleep._ Between classes, work, and studying for his midterms, he'd been forcing himself to survive on about four hours a night for two weeks, and he could feel it catching up to him. Taking a long sip of his coffee, he took a deep breath and turned back to the textbook. The letters and numbers in the equations swam before his eyes.

            "Ugh, damn it!" He grumbled, slamming the book shut and pressing his fingers to his temples.  As he did so, he felt someone suddenly standing beside him.

            "Are you alright, Dean?"

            "Cas. Uh, I'm sorry. I thought you'd left. Yeah. I'm fine. Just getting a bit stressed out about my midterms."

            "There is no need to apologise, Dean. I am only recently out of graduate school; I remember the examination stress well. I," he paused. Dean glanced up at him. "I wonder if this is appropriate, but…is there any way I can assist you with your exam preparation?"

            Dean's mouth dropped open, despite his best efforts to maintain a neutral expression. "Uh. Well. I dunno. I mean, how's your science background? I'm, uh, a bio major. Chem minor. So I mean, I dunno how much of that kind of stuff you took, since you were going to library school and stuff." _Wow, Dean, way to sound brilliant,_ he thought sarcastically to himself. _Quit acting like a god damn schoolgirl with a crush, idiot. Even if he is hot. And weird. But also hot. And probably not interested so get over it._ He was so engrossed with his inner monologue that he completely missed Cas' response to his inquiry. He realised Cas was waiting for him to say something.

            "Uh, sorry, Cas. I wasn't paying attention. Mind repeating that?" he asked awkwardly. Cas inclined his head slightly, that odd half-smile teasing at the corners of his mouth again.

            "I said, I was an anthropology major in my undergrad, but I took a biology minor. I may be able to assist you, depending on the subjects you are taking." Dean stared at him. He wasn't sure what he'd been expecting, but it hadn't been that.

            "Uh, well, I'm working on organic chem right now, because I've got that tomorrow. But I'm taking immunology and molecular genetics exams next week."

            "Yes, my chemistry is weak. But…if you would like, genetics were a particular interest of mine during my undergraduate coursework. If it is appropriate, I would be happy to assist you in your studying this weekend. I do not work in the library on weekends."

            Dean took a deep breath. "Um. Yeah. You know what? That'd be great," he said. "I'm having a bit of trouble with my genetics class, to be honest."

            That wide smile that Dean was beginning to enjoy seeing more than he should crossed Cas' face again. "I would be happy to help you. When would be convenient for you to study?"

            "Anytime," Dean said. "I don't work this weekend. Does Saturday morning work for you, or is the afternoon better? I don't know how late you like to sleep."

            "The morning will be fine, Dean. Thank you for asking. Should we meet in front of the library?"

            "Sure, that's fine…is ten okay? And…seriously, Cas….you don't have to thank me, you're the one offering to help me out on your day off."

            "It is my pleasure to be able to help you. I should go and let you finish your shift. I will see you on Saturday then, Dean, if not tomorrow. Good luck on your exam in the morning." With that, Cas turned and slipped out of the store. Dean grinned to himself, standing up and grabbing his textbook to put it back in his bag.  He hadn't really gotten anything accomplished, but he decided if he didn't know it by now, he wouldn't know it in the morning. Returning from the drop off of his book, he began the cleanup routine set out for the closing shift at the store. _Organic chem tomorrow, then work, then sleep, then…studying with Cas._ He felt a shot of excitement go through him at the last item on the schedule, followed by an instant of dread.

            He was in way over his head this time, and he knew it.

            


	3. Chapter 3

Dean sailed through his exam with relative ease and left the lecture hall feeling mostly confident, although he couldn't fully shake the nagging doubt that it had been too easy and he'd missed something important. Still, he felt more relaxed than he had in awhile as he strolled into the coffee shop to start his shift.

*****

            Dean's shift passed quickly. There was a steady stream of customers, and if he was disappointed that none of them were wearing a trenchcoat, tie, and apparently permanently mussed brown hair, he did an excellent job of hiding it. He made the last drink in his queue and then turned to the girl standing at the till.

            "Okay, Anna, I'm out of here, you're on your own. Everything should be stocked up." She beamed at him.

            "Thanks, Dean. You're off all weekend, right? Any plans?"

            "Yeah, a few. Studying, mainly. Two more midterms next week." Dean said. Anna was a year younger than Dean and, much to Dean's regret, was harbouring an obvious crush on him. They'd hooked up once, about a year earlier, after a few too many at an end-of-midterms party put on by the Science Students' Association. Dean had realised the next morning it had been a mistake - he liked Anna well enough, she was a nice girl and definitely cute - but he wasn't actually interested in pursuing her. He'd made that clear and she'd accepted it, but he could tell, although she never pushed it, that she was still interested. He grabbed his backpack from the back room and headed out of the shop, swinging his bag over one shoulder and waving at Anna as he did so.

            He'd planned on heading straight back to his dorm, but decided to stop by the cafeteria on his way past to get a burger for dinner since it was entirely likely he'd fall asleep without eating if he didn't. He entered the dining hall, squeezing his way past a few groups of first-year girls and stepping into the thankfully short line in front of the burger station. After ordering his usual (bacon cheeseburger, hold the veggies) he grabbed the foil wrapped package and stepped into the cashier's line.  He stood impatiently, fidgeting with the edge of his wallet in his pocket as he waited for the person two customers in front of him to slowly count out precise change. Suddenly, he felt a slight touch to the back of his coat, as though someone was standing too close to him in the line. He spun around, about to ask them to move back a bit, when he was suddenly met with an already-familiar set of blue eyes.

            " Hello, Dean."

            "Woah. I mean. Uh. Hey. Cas. Didn't expect to run into you here."

            "I just finished my shift at the library. I'm quite tired, I don't feel like cooking this evening.  I did not expect to see you, either."

            "I just finished work too. And cooking in the dorms sucks. I usually grab dinner here, if I'm not working through dinner."

            "That makes sense. My rooms at university did not have convenient kitchens either. I believe that's common." Dean grinned slightly. The guy had such an odd way of talking. He shifted his weight for a minute, trying to decide how to respond, when suddenly there was the sound of someone clearing their throat behind him.

            "Ah, Dean," Cas said tentatively. "I believe it is your turn." Dean turned quickly.

            "Oh. Uh, sorry about that," he said to the cashier, quickly pulling out his debit card from his wallet and handing it to her.

            "Just fine," she said with a knowing smile as she swiped his card and waited for him to input his PIN information. A moment later the machine beeped, indicating the end of the transaction. "There you go!" she said cheerfully. "Enjoy your dinner."

            "Yeah, thanks," Dean said, stepping away from the lineup and taking much longer than was really necessary to slide his card back into the proper slot in his wallet. Just as he finished and stuck the small black leather pouch into his pocket, Cas was beside him again.

            "It was nice to see you, Dean. Are we still going to meet for your study session tomorrow morning?" Cas asked.

            "Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Ten, right? By the library?" That small half smile that Dean was getting to know well crossed Cas' face.

            "Yes. That sounds right. I will see you tomorrow, Dean." With that, he was gone. Damn, but he was strangely fast sometimes.

            _Should've asked him if he wanted to hang here and eat…_ Dean thought with disappointment, before he could stop himself.  He stared at the spot where Cas had been for a minute before shaking his head and leaving the cafeteria to go back to his dorm.

*****

            Dean woke up the next morning feeling more  refreshed than he had in weeks. After he'd finished his burger he'd found a marathon of old Star Trek reruns on TV and fallen asleep while watching it. Glancing over at his clock, he felt his heart stop.

            _9:45_ , the luminescent green numbers read.

            "Shit. Shit shit shit." Dean said, shucking off his boxers before grabbing the closest clean pair he could see and pulling on a pair of jeans. He found a soft brown long sleeved shirt on his floor and, giving it a quick sniff - it smelled okay, so he decided to go for it - put it on. He snatched a pair of socks off the top of his dresser and yanked them on roughly before heading quickly into the small bathroom. He splashed some water on his face and quickly ran his fingers through his short hair, desperately wishing he had time to shower. He finished in the bathroom and then quickly put on his shoes and jacket, barely remembering to grab his backpack and keys before racing out his door.

            He arrived in front of the library exactly five minutes late, breathing hard. Cas was already standing there, waiting for him.

            "Cas," he said. "I'm sorry I'm late. I overslept."

            "It's not a problem, Dean." Cas replied. "I just arrived myself." Dean smiled.

            "You sure?"

            "Of course. I do know when I got here." Dean's smile turned into an expression of vague confusion for a minute before he smiled again.

            "That's not what I…never mind. You want to go in?"

            "Yes. That will make studying much easier. It's chilly today." Dean chuckled as he turned and pulled the door to the library open, holding it and motioning for Cas to pass through first.

            "Thank you," Cas said, looking intently at Dean's face as he stepped through the door behind him.  

            "It's nothing," Dean replied. He noticed Cas looking at him and dropped his face slightly as he felt a slight warmth rush to his cheeks. "Let's go find a table, you can help me wrap my mind around genetics."

*****

            Dean laughed louder than he probably should, given the quiet library. The longer he spent with Cas, the more he was finding that the guy was actually really funny under the bizarre exterior. He was definitely a little awkward sometimes, and his apparent indifference to TV meant he didn't usually catch Dean's pop culture references, but he had a good sense of humour in his own way, and he was a great tutor. Dean was understanding more about the material in his genetics class after his short time studying with Cas than he had the entire first half of his semester. Suddenly, Dean felt his stomach give a small rumble. _Ugh, no breakfast,_ he thought. _Wonder if it's lunchtime yet._  He pulled out his phone and quickly activated the screen to check the time.

            "Woah. Hey, uh, Cas? This has been really fantastic…but it's like three o'clock. Are you hungry? I was thinking of getting some lunch. If you wanted to join me, or something?" he asked, his voice getting quieter. _Ugh, get a grip, Winchester,_ he chided himself. He couldn't remember the last time he'd been this - yeah, okay, he'd finally admit it - head over heels for someone, and he couldn't even figure out why this guy.

            "I would like that, Dean. I am enjoying our time together. I find I'm unwilling to see the end of it quite yet." Cas said. Dean's eyes shot up from where they'd been dancing between his pencil and his binder to see Cas looking at him earnestly.

            "That's…um. That's great." Dean said, his heart speeding up. "Yeah. I'll pack this stuff up and we can go. You want to go to the cafeteria or somewhere off campus?" he asked.

            "I believe the cafeteria is the most convenient." Cas replied. Dean nodded.

            "Yeah. Definitely." He shoved his binder roughly into his bag and tossed his pencil in after it, not caring about organisation at the moment. He swung it up over his shoulder and grabbed his jacket, waiting for Cas to pull on his own jacket before they started to walk towards the library's exit.

*****

            The two men got their food and found an empty table in a corner of the cafeteria. As they ate, Dean took great joy in poking fun at Cas and trying to make him laugh. He was only successful about half the time, but more often than not he at least managed to elicit one of those goofy little half-smirks that Cas had. Now and then, when Dean teased him a little bit too much, Cas' eyes would stray away from him as he focused intently on a point at the table. Dean could never help but smile at the awkward embarrassment on Cas' face.

            Long after they'd finished their food, Dean suddenly had a realisation hit him.

            "Aw, crap…Cas, I'm sorry, you didn't have anywhere else to be today, did you? I'd hate to think you had things to do and I'm just here wasting your time."

            "I had nothing else planned today, Dean. And…I doubt that I would ever consider time with you to be time wasted. I am," he paused, seeming to weigh his next words carefully. "I am greatly enjoying spending today with you."

            Dean felt another rush of heat hit his face. He swallowed.

            "I'm having a good time too, Cas." His voice was quieter than he'd planned, but he didn't miss the look of pure happiness, despite the fact that there was only a small hint of a smile, that crossed Cas' face. The two men fell silent for the first time in hours. Suddenly,

            "Cas?"

            "Dean?"

            They spoke simultaneously. Cas stopped and motioned for Dean to speak first. Dean took a deep breath, nervous that he still couldn't fully read the librarian's facial expressions.

            "I was thinking….do you wanna go get some tea, or something?" he asked. "I'm not really sure I'm in the mood to study more just now."  A rare, full smile passed across Cas' face, lighting up his blue eyes.

            "I would like that, Dean. Although, I thought you preferred coffee?" he asked, referring to their first conversation - was it really only a few days ago? After today, Dean couldn't seem to imagine a day without the other man in it. Dean grinned.

            "Yeah, most of the time. But I dunno. Today I kinda feel like having tea." Cas smiled again.

            "I would enjoy that a great deal," he said, nodding. "Perhaps I'll try yet another new flavour this time." Dean stood up, gathering their trays and moving to the nearby garbage can to empty them.

            "There's a great tropical green tea that I think you'll like." he suggested, picking up his bag after he finished with the trays. Cas smiled in response and the two left the cafeteria, walking a half-step closer to each other than they had when they entered.

*****

            The coffee shop was very close to the cafeteria, much to Cas and Dean's relief. A biting wind had picked up while they were eating lunch and it was getting fairly cold. They entered the café quickly and stepped up towards the counter.

            "Hey, Benny," Dean said. Benny eyed Dean and  Cas, a curious look crossing his face.

            "Hey, Dean. Day off?" he asked.

            "Yeah. I'm off all weekend. Can you get me a couple of the tropical green teas, please?" he asked casually, handing Benny the exact change for the two drinks. He heard Cas start to say something as Benny turned to make their order and turned to him, speaking quickly.

            "Don't, Cas. It's my treat," he grinned. "It's the least I can do for you putting up with my annoying ass and teaching me genetics," he added quickly by way of keeping things light.

            "I don't find your…" Cas started, trailing off when he realised Dean was teasing him again. He smiled. "Thank you."

            "It's nothing. Believe me," Dean said.

            "Here ya go, Dean," Benny said, sliding the two steaming mugs across the counter.

            "Thanks, Benny. Appreciate it," Dean said, grabbing the mugs and handing one to Cas, motioning towards the seating area.

            Dean and Cas had been sitting and talking for awhile, and long after their mugs were empty Dean happened to glance out the window. Noticing that the sky had gone fully dark, he looked at the large clock on the wall.

            "Oh, crap! Cas, it's like seven. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to keep you all day."

            "Dean. I believe I already told you that I have been enjoying this time with you." Cas replied slowly. Dean started to blush again - _When did I turn into such a girl?_ \- he thought to himself, embarrassed by it.

            "Well, yeah. But I mean. I doubt you expected to spend this much time…" he said awkwardly.

            "I did not, you're right. But that doesn't mean it's a negative thing." Cas said. "Unless…you are not enjoying yourself. In which case I apologise." Dean started shaking his head before Cas even finished speaking.

            "I'm probably enjoying myself more than I should," he admitted. "It's…been a long time since I've wanted to spend this much time with someone." His eyes dropped as understanding dawned on Cas' face.

            "Dean, I don't know if this is appropriate, since I am an employee of the university," Cas started.

            "Yeah. I. Yeah. I get it. Sorry, Cas. I didn't mean to make things awkward," Dean said, jumping up quickly and grabbing his jacket, thrusting his arms into the sleeves. "Totally weird. Sorry." He grabbed his backpack and started to turn away. He was halfway around when he felt a warm hand grasp his own, stopping him from moving away.

            "Dean. You didn't let me finish." Cas' low voice gave him pause. There was a note of something in it that he couldn't place. He turned back to face him.

            "I don't know if it's appropriate, Dean, but I find myself wanting to spend time with you regardless. And as I am not actually a teacher, I doubt there is any actual regulation against my doing so." Dean fought to keep his jaw from dropping as his eyes widened. He hadn't expected that response. For one thing, he hadn't been entirely certain Cas was, well, interested in guys.

            "Oh," was all he said. He looked down, realising Cas' hand was still wrapped around his own from when he had grabbed it in an attempt to keep Dean from leaving.

            "Cas, do you wanna come watch a movie at my place with me?" He asked suddenly, shocking even himself with the invitation. Cas smiled again. He was doing that a lot today. Dean liked it.

            "I think I would enjoy that, Dean." Cas said. "You did mention that my knowledge of movies was quite low. Now that I have tutored you in genetics, perhaps you can tutor me in movies." Dean grinned widely.

            "You're on. Let's go," he said, starting to walk and not arguing in the least when Cas retained his hold on Dean's hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will take a little longer, unfortunately. I have an absolutely INSANE next two weeks as far as due dates go at school, so I won't have as much writing time as I'd like, but I'll get it up as soon as I can. Thanks for the feedback so far-I seriously appreciate it.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean woke up slowly, in an upright position, bathed in a bright blue glow. His joints were stiff, and there was an unfamiliar weight pressed against his left side. He opened his eyes and looked over, seeing Cas leaning slightly on him, head tipped back, one hand resting on Dean's thigh. Dean froze, unsure what to do and instantly grateful that his roommate had gone home for the weekend. Trying not to jostle Cas, Dean gave in to his body's need to shift, attempting to release some of the stiffness from his muscles. his effort failed - as he slowly stretched his right leg, Cas opened his eyes.

            "Cas, hey," Dean said, his voice still slightly thick from sleep. He coughed to clear his throat. "Sorry if I woke you. I wasn't trying to."

            Cas smiled sleepily, and Dean felt his stomach jump.

            "Don't worry about it, Dean," Cas said slowly. "I'm sorry to have fallen asleep. I should have just gone home." Dean shook his head.

            "No way, man. If you're that tired, I wouldn't want you driving anyway. My roommate is out of town for the weekend. It's still the middle of the night - crash here. I'll grab some extra blankets and a spare pillow for you so you'll actually be comfortable." Dean stood and entered his room, returning a moment later with a large, soft blanket and one of the pillows from his bed. When he re-entered the small sitting area, Cas was still upright on the couch, but had turned his body to lean against the side.

            "Here, buddy, let me make that a little more comfortable for you." He placed a light hand on the top of Cas' back, between his shoulder blades, pressing him forward slightly and slipping the pillow between his back and the arm of the couch. Unfolding the blanket, he set it at the other end of the couch, near Cas' feet.

            "Um…." he started, shifting slightly uncomfortably. "You going to be okay here? Need anything else?" He was rewarded with yet another of Cas' smiles, which were quickly becoming more common.

            "I'm fine, Dean," he said. "This is very kind of you."

            "It's nothing. Really. I'm glad you're here." Dean said, surprising himself with the honesty in his words. He was usually - especially recently - a slow to warm up kind of guy. He liked people well enough, was good with them, but rarely got close to anyone. But with Cas…he couldn't put his finger on it. Something about the librarian was drawing him in, although he'd be lying to himself if he said the thought didn't scare him. Shaking his head slightly to pull himself out of his reverie, he found Cas staring at him intently. He dragged his eyes from Cas' pale blue ones, only to find them resting on the other man's lips. He blinked quickly.

            "Okay. So. Great." Dean said quickly, trying to distract himself. "Um. Sleep well," he said, turning back towards his bedroom.

            "Sweet dreams, Dean." Cas' voice behind him was rough - with sleep, Dean thought quickly, that was all - and Dean entered his room quickly, closing the door quietly behind him. He sank into his bed still fully dressed, trying not to think about Cas wrapped in his spare blanket on the couch, his head on Dean's pillow.

            Dean slept fitfully and woke early. Opening his door as quietly as he could, he peeked out to see Cas sitting upright but sideways, much as Dean had left him a few hours before. His head was bent slightly over a book. Seeming to sense Dean's presence, he lifted his head.

            "Good morning, Dean," he said.

            "Morning, Cas. You're up early…did you sleep okay?" Dean asked.

            "I suppose I could say the same to you," Cas said, half smiling. "I was very comfortable, thank you. That's a lovely blanket. I have an extremely persistent internal alarm - I'm up by six whether I need to be or not."

            "That…sucks, man. I'm sorry." Dean said. Cas chuckled.

            "It's hardly your fault, Dean," he responded.

            "Aw, you know what I mean," Dean said, a blush rising to his cheeks.

            "I do. I apologise for teasing you," Cas said.

            "It's okay. I'm just not used to it," Dean replied. "Um, I do gotta study today, but I was thinking…do you want to get coffee or…something, first?" He had been about to suggest breakfast, but was overwhelmed by a surge of fear that it would imply something he still wasn't positive Cas was interested in, despite their conversation and slightly more-than-friendly behaviour the day before. He was rewarded with another smile and a nod from Cas.

            "I would like that. You should eat, if you're going to be studying. I know a - this is going to sound like a contradiction, I know - great diner that is about a five minute walk from campus. Would you like to have breakfast with me, Dean?" Cas asked. Dean's stomach started to do that jumpy thing again as he felt his heartbeat speed up.

            "Yeah, Cas," he said quietly. "That'd be great."

            "Okay," Cas said, seeming to wait for something.

            "Um. Do you mind if I grab a shower first?" Dean asked.

            "No, of course not. I hope you don't mind that I won't be able to," Cas replied.

            "No! I mean, if you'd rather, you're welcome to use mine. But it doesn't bother me or anything," Dean said quickly.

            "Thank you, Dean. But as I haven't anything clean to change into, it seems pointless to shower just now. Take as much time as you need - I can read my book." Cas' expression had turned thoughtful as he regarded Dean carefully. Dean turned away quickly when he realised his eyes were once again focused on Cas' lips.

            "I'll just be a couple of minutes," Dean said, dropping his face and ducking into his bedroom.

            Dean emerged a few minutes later, hair still damp and dressed (more carefully than he really wanted to admit) in a pair of jeans and a dark olive green long-sleeved shirt in a soft fabric.

            "Hey, Cas, I'm ready whenever you are," Dean said. Cas' eyes shot up, his head following in a double-take as he took in Dean's appearance.

            "I'm ready," he said. Cas nodded and stood up.

*****

            Dean was disappointed when they had both finished their breakfasts and he could no longer extend the morning. Looking at the clock on the wall of the diner with regret, he finally spoke up.

            "I guess I should head back to campus to study," he said, his voice more dejected than he'd intended. Cas followed Dean's gaze to the clock.

            "Oh, it's getting fairly late, isn't it? I'm sorry to have kept you so long, Dean," he said. Dean shook his head.

            "No way, man, this was…well, it was great. I'm kinda bummed I've gotta go, to be honest, but I've really got to do well on my midterms," he admitted.

            "Of course you do, Dean." Cas said, though Dean could see what he thought was disappointment on the other man's face. Just then, he had an idea.

            "Hey, Cas?" he asked, a note of nervousness in his voice as he suddenly started to doubt his plan.

            "Yes, Dean?"

            "I…well, I was thinking. Could I get your number? I could maybe text you after my midterms are done, we could hang out again. Do another movie tutoring session," he added with a grin. Cas smiled widely.

            "I like that idea," he said. Dean pulled out his phone and had Cas dictate his number to him, sending him a text message after the information was programmed into his contacts list.

            "There, now you've got my number, too. So, you know, if you ever need to get ahold of me or something…you can." Dean said, his eyes connecting with Cas'.

            "Thank you, Dean." Cas' voice was quiet. Just then, their waitress stopped by the table.

            "Here you go, guys. Thanks so much. I hope everything was okay!" she said cheerfully.

            "Yeah, great. Thank you," Dean said, pulling his eyes from Cas' and turning to her with a bright smile. "We just pay up at the front, right?" he asked.

            "That's right. Amy's up there and she'll give you a hand with anything you need."

            "Perfect. Thanks so much," he paused as he took a quick look at her nametag, which he hadn't thought to check earlier, "Julia." The waitress giggled and walked away.  Dean and Cas stood up and headed to the front. Julia had split the bill automatically, so they each went up to the till and paid for their food before heading out of the diner. They stood outside for a minute, facing each other and standing close enough that their hands were brushing against each other.

            "So, um…" Dean said. "Thanks for suggesting this place. It was really good." Cas smiled.

            "I'm glad you liked it. I've had a lot of fun, Dean." Cas' voice was sincere.

            "Yeah, me too." Yet again, Dean found he couldn't pull his eyes from Cas' as he felt one of Cas' fingers begin to run lightly over his hand. Dean's stomach soared briefly as he folded his hand over Cas', stopping his finger's motion and squeezing lightly. The contact lasted only a moment before Dean pulled his hand away.

            "Um. So I'll-I'll text you." he said, his heart beat quickly as the tip of his tongue darted out to lick his lips slightly.

            "Great," Cas said, his eyes shooting back and forth between Dean's eyes and his lips. Dean turned, walking away quickly.   

*****

            Dean walked out of his molecular genetics exam with a smile on his face. Cas' tutoring had evidently done him good; he felt really confident about the results. Moving to the side of the corridor and leaning against the wall, he pulled out his cell phone.

            _Hey Cas, I know you're probably working, but I figured I'd text you now. Done all my midterms and I'm pretty sure you saved my ass in genetics. Thanks._

            He grinned and hit the send button before flicking his phone off silent and sliding it back in his pocket before starting to walk again, heading back to his dorm to take a well-earned break.

*****

            He was dozing on the couch, watching TV, when his phone buzzed in his pocket. He jumped before he pulled it out and slid his finger across the screen to unlock it and bring up the message.

            _anytime. want to get together, or are you busy with other work now? I know you've got class tomorrow…_

            Dean's smile widened as he read the message. He tapped out a quick reply.

            _You kidding? Never too busy. Where are you? Just off work?_

_Yes_

_Hang out there for a few. I'm not doing anything right now, just watching TV. I'll meet     you there. Wait inside though, it got cold today._

            Standing up, Dean went into the bathroom to double-check his hair and then headed for the door, grabbing his jacket on the way past.

            He made it to the library in record time and headed inside. He found Cas sitting in one of the uncomfortable armchairs in the main common area, reading his book again. Dean approached him from behind, and touched Cas lightly on the shoulder to announce his presence. Cas' eyes lifted from his book immediately, meeting Dean's with a smile.

            "Dean," he said, obviously pleased.

            "Hey, Cas," Dean said, unable to stop the grin from covering his face. "You wanna get some food or something? It's about that time."

            Cas nodded. "What do you feel like?" he asked.

            "Want to go to the diner again?" Dean suggested. "I mean, their breakfast food was good but the true test of a diner is their burgers." Cas chuckled.

            "Sounds great," he said, standing up.

            They walked quickly to the diner, trying to get out of the cold as quickly as possible. They stepped inside, happy that there wasn't going to be a wait for a table. They were seated - by Julia again, Dean noted - and only needed a moment each with the menus before they'd decided what they wanted. Their food came just a few minutes later. Dean looked at his burger hungrily before picking it up and taking a bite.

            "Okay, this is a great burger," he said after a few more bites.

            Cas grinned. "I told you this was a good diner," he said.

            "Didn't doubt you for a second." Dean said, returning Cas' smile. They ate in silence for a few minutes, until both of their plates were empty, periodically looking at each other and smiling.

            After they finished their food, they sat and talked for almost an hour before deciding to leave. The bill had been brought quite a bit earlier and Cas grabbed the small plastic folder quickly, grinning at Dean.

            "My treat," he said. Dean started to shake his head and Cas held up a finger. "Dean, please. Don't fight me on this. Consider it a congratulations for doing so well on your midterms. I know you haven't gotten your marks back yet, but I know you've done excellently."

            Dean blushed. "Thanks, Cas," he said. Cas' smile widened again as they made their way to the front of the diner, stopping so Cas could pay for their food before they left. They walked back to the campus together, close enough that they bumped into each other's sides periodically, laughing when it happened.

            The walk back to campus was disappointingly short, Dean thought as they found themselves back in front of the library. Turning to face Cas, Dean smiled.

            "Thanks again for dinner, Cas.  It really wasn't necessary, but I do appreciate it."

            "You're welcome, Dean. It was my pleasure. Thanks for letting me do it."

            Dean found his eyes drawn to Cas' again, as they so often were when the two of them found themselves in conversations like this. "So, um, I work tomorrow and Saturday, but I've got Friday off…if you're still interested in more movies?" he asked.

            Cas nodded. "Friday sounds great, Dean. Do…" he paused. "Do you want to come over to my place this time?" he asked, his voice hesitant. Dean felt his breath hitch in his chest and forced himself to breathe deeply to counteract it.

            "Sure. Probably better anyway, since my roommate'll be around. He's a good guy, but he's kind of annoying sometimes." Dean said, still forcing himself to take deep breaths but trying to hide it.

            "Great," Cas said, his voice holding a note of relief. "I'm off at four…do you want to meet me here?" he asked.

            "Yeah. This works fine," Dean said. Cas smiled again.  They stood awkwardly for a moment, not speaking but neither seeming willing to turn away, either. Finally, Dean gave in. He stepped slightly forward and wrapped his arms around Cas' shoulders, pulling him in for a hug. Cas tensed slightly for a split second, but quickly relaxed and wrapped his arms around Dean's waist in return. They held each other tightly for a minute, Dean angling his face towards the other man's neck. They released their hold slowly, both apparently unenthusiastic about letting go, and leaving their hands resting lightly on each other's arms, eyes reconnecting, as Dean spoke again.

            "So, Friday, then," he said softly.

            "Friday," Cas said, his voice slightly rougher than usual. "I might come by the shop tomorrow, though…if you don't mind." Dean was shaking his head before Cas even fully completed his sentence.

            "I don't mind. I'd…like to have the chance to see you," he said, smiling. Cas grinned.

            "See you tomorrow, then."

            "Yeah. See you tomorrow, Cas." He couldn't resist the urge to squeeze Cas' hand slightly as his own hands slid lightly along the other man's forearms as he turned away. He walked back towards his dorm with a smile on his face and his heart pounding.


	5. Chapter 5

By the time Friday afternoon rolled around, Dean was so excited he could barely stand it. He was finished with his classes by one, but had decided that morning to just stay and do some of his bio readings in the coffee shop until it was time for him to meet up with Cas. He'd been there for a couple of hours when Anna came and sat beside him.

            "Hey, Dean," she said.

            "Oh, hi Anna. You on break?" he asked, noting the cup in her hand.

            "Nah, I just got off shift. Thought I'd come over and say hi before I left. How come you're still around? You don't work today, do you?"

            "Nope. I'm meeting…someone in a little while. I decided to just stick around rather than walk back to my dorm. You know me, I'm lazy." He grinned, and Anna smiled back.

            "You meeting that librarian?" she asked curiously.

            "How did you…" he asked, heat rushing to his cheeks.

            "Benny. He was working when you guys came in a week or so ago, and he mentioned it. You guys dating?" Dean felt the blush deepen on his cheeks.

            "What? We're not dating, Anna." 

            Anna raised an eyebrow at him. "Oh, really. So, what are you doing then?"

            "We're friends. We're hanging out." His voice was coming out a lot quicker than he'd intended it to.

            "Hmm…and these hangouts wouldn't resemble dates, would they? You know, having dinner together, getting coffee, maybe sitting together on your couch watching movies?"

            "Maybe but…not exactly…I don't know?" he stammered. Anna grinned at him.

            "Relax, Dean," she said. "I think I know who the guy is, based on Benny's description. If it's who I’m thinking of, he's cute. You should go for it." She leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Have fun on your date tonight," she said, winking at him before walking away. Dean's heart was pounding in his chest as he watched her leave. He'd been trying so hard to just think of Cas as a friend. He really hadn't wanted to get involved with anyone. But then he thought about how much fun they had together. How they seemed to fit, how they didn't have to explain themselves to each other. He thought about how much he missed Cas when he couldn't see him. How disappointed he'd been the day before when Cas had only been able to drop by the store during a rush, and Dean had only had time to make his tea and give him a quick wave. He thought about hugging him two days before, after they'd had dinner together, about how their hands always seemed to find ways to touch.

            He was starting to think he and Cas were going to have to talk.

*****

            Dean stepped into the library doors at exactly four o'clock. Glancing around to make sure Cas wasn't there yet, he went to sit down and wait. He'd been there less than five minutes when he felt a hand on his arm. He jumped slightly but smiled widely when he glanced down and noticed the arm of a trenchcoat alongside his own arm.

            "Hello, Dean." Cas said.

            "Cas. Hey!" Dean said, standing up and turning to face Cas. Without a thought, he quickly leaned forward and pulled Cas into a tight hug. He didn't hold him for long before he stepped back, blushing slightly. "Uh, sorry," he mumbled. Cas smiled.

            "Please, don't apologise. Are you ready to go?" he asked.

            "Yeah, definitely. I've got DVDs in my bag," Dean replied. "I figured we could decide what to watch when we got to your place."

            "Yes, that's a good idea. Thank you, Dean." Cas said.

            Dean shook his head. "Seriously, you have nothing to thank me for," he said.

            The drive to Cas' apartment was short. Ten minutes after they'd met in the library, Cas had pulled into his parking spot and they were climbing out of the car, and five minutes after that they were stepping into his apartment after the elevator took them to his floor. Dean slipped off his shoes and left them on the mat before following Cas into the living room. He pulled off his backpack and his coat before sitting down on the couch beside Cas.

            "So, what do you feel like watching?" Dean asked as he pulled a small pile of DVDs out of his backpack.            

            Cas shook his head. "Nope. You're the movie tutor, remember? Surprise me," he said with a grin. Dean laughed.

            "Fine, you win," he said. He shuffled through the pile before pulling one out. "We'll just continue with the Star Trek movie marathon, then," he grinned as he clicked the DVD out of its case and moved to put it in the player. He came back to the couch and sat down, extremely aware of the way he automatically sat very close to Cas, their thighs and arms touching. He rest his hands on the top of his thighs, trying not to let himself touch Cas any more than he already was. As the introductory music for the movie started, he could practically feel Cas' eyes on him. He turned to look at the other man, who looked slightly worried.

            "You're tense, Dean. Are you all right?" he asked. Dean nodded guiltily.

            "Yeah," he said, smiling and taking a deep breath. "I'm great, Cas. Sorry," he added. His heart rate increased when Cas grinned and covered Dean's hand with his own.

            "Don't apologise," he said, chuckling. Dean smiled and relaxed back into the couch.

            Two hours or so later, the credits rolled across the screen. "So, what'd you think?" Dean asked Cas, turning his head slightly to face him. Their hands were still joined, resting on Dean's thigh, and their bodies had inclined themselves towards each other.

            "It was…interesting," Cas said slowly, "although I still don't know how whales are a good topic for a science fiction movie." Dean grinned widely.

            "Ah, don't question it," he said. "It's classic. Just accept it and enjoy."

            "I did enjoy it, Dean," Cas replied. Dean shook his head slightly, his smile still plastered to his face.

            "Good. I'm glad." They both fell silent for a moment, seemingly unable to pull their eyes apart from each other.

            Suddenly, Dean's stomach rumbled loudly. He blushed.

            "Oops," he said, pulling his eyes quickly away from Cas' and looking down at his stomach in irritation. _Traitor,_ he thought to himself. Cas smiled.

            "I made chili this morning, if you're interested," he said. "It's been cooking throughout the day." Dean's eyes widened and he fought to keep his jaw from dropping.

            "You cook, too," he said, half to himself. "I'm pretty sure you're actually perfect." He turned red again when he realised he'd said the last sentence out loud. Cas smiled shyly and looked down at his lap.

            "I've hardly done anything noteworthy, Dean," he said quietly. "Would you like some dinner?"

            Dean nodded. "Please. It sounds really great, Cas. Thanks." They both stood up at the same time, hands falling apart finally but staying very close to one another as Dean followed Cas into his kitchen. Cas flipped the knob on the slow cooker sitting on the counter to 'keep warm' before taking two bowls out of the cupboard and dishing chili into both of them. They carried their bowls back to the couch and sat down, chatting casually about their days while they ate. When they had both finished eating, Dean took Cas' bowl from him and brought them both to the kitchen, rinsing them briefly in the sink before returning to sit beside Cas again. His heart beat quickly as he realised it was time for him to ask Cas what was going on between them, exactly. He turned to face Cas, pulling one leg up onto the couch and curling it underneath him.

            "Hey, Cas?" he asked, cautiously.

            "Yes, Dean?" Cas replied. Dean took a deep breath.

            "Cas, are we…dating?" Dean asked. Cas regarded him carefully, seeming to think about the question for a moment. Dean shifted uncomfortably, wondering if he'd offended the other man. After a minute, he couldn't handle the silence.

            "I'm sorry. I'm sure I'm just over thinking this. I hope I haven't-" he was silenced when Cas leaned forward and  - finally, Dean thought - pressed his lips softly to Dean's. The kiss was brief, and Cas soon sat back, looking slightly concerned.

            "My apologies," he said softly. "I could not think of a better way to express myself." Dean's breath hitched as he tried to formulate an answer through the buzz in his head.

            "No. I mean, don't apologise, I mean…" he babbled. He certainly hadn't expected that kind of a response from Cas. "So, um, should I assume yes, then?" he said haltingly. Cas' face split into a smile again.

            "I would say it is a safe assumption, Dean, yes. That is to say, I would like to consider it so, if you would."

            "You asking me to be your boyfriend, Cas?" Dean said, a teasing note in his voice attempting to cover up his slightly shaky hands and pounding heart. Dean saw a blush rise in Cas' cheeks.

            "I, ah…" Cas mumbled.

            "Because I'd say yes," Dean said. "I don't know why. I don't know what's happening here, Cas. I wasn't looking for this, honestly. But…I like it. I'd say yes."

            "Then…I suppose I'm asking." Cas said quietly. Dean grinned widely before leaning forward to initiate the kiss himself this time, one hand running lightly through Cas' short brown hair.

            They made it through two more movies, wrapped in each other's arms,  before Dean stretched and looked at Cas sadly.

            "I guess I should be getting back," he said. "I don't want you to have to drive me too late at night."

            Cas' face fell. "What time do you work tomorrow, Dean?" he asked.

            "Noon, why?" he asked. Cas seemed to mull this information over for a minute.

            "Would…you like to stay here tonight?" he asked. "You're welcome to sleep on the couch or…wherever you like," his eyes were fixed determinedly on the floor. Dean angled his body around until his eyes met Cas', and keeping their gazes locked brought his head back up slowly.

            "I'd like that," he said, leaning forward to kiss Cas again softly.

            They fell asleep together several hours later in Cas' bed, bodies tangled around each other with Dean's head on Cas' chest.

*****

            Dean woke up the next morning with his body still pressed tightly to Cas', surprised to see the sun streaming through the window. He shifted slightly to reach behind him for his phone and saw Cas' eyes open as he moved. Dean smiled.

            "Morning," he said.

            "Good morning, Dean," Cas said, smiling in return.

            "You slept late…what happened to not sleeping past six?" Dean asked, indicating the sun shining into the room.

            "Apparently the right company allows my internal alarm to quiet itself. I've not slept so well in a very long time," Cas said. Dean smiled again and kissed Cas lightly on the cheek before grabbing his phone. When he flipped it over and activated the screen, his heart stopped.

            He had four missed calls and a voicemail from Bobby, and it was 12:30pm.  


	6. Chapter 6

"Shit!" Dean shouted, pulling away from Cas quickly and sliding out of the bed, his fingers already dialing the phone. It rang twice before Bobby picked up.

            _"Hello?"_ came the familiar, grumpy voice.

            "Bobby. It's Dean."

            " _Dean? Where the hell are ya, boy? I got worried."_

"Ugh, Bobby, I'm so sorry. I overslept. Like, by a lot. I'll be there in fifteen minutes," he said anxiously.

            _"Don't worry about it, Dean, I called in Benny, he's coverin' your shift today. He says you owe him one."_

            Dean sank to the edge of the bed and rest his forehead on the hand that wasn't currently pressing the phone to his ear.

            "You sure, Bobby? I'm really, really sorry this happened," he said.

            _"Dean you haven't been late or missed a shift since ya started at the store three years ago, and God knows you've picked up more than enough shifts when I was short handed. I think I can let one Saturday shift slide."_ Dean sighed in relief.

            "Thanks, Bobby."

            _"See you tomorrow morning, Dean,"_ Bobby said by way of goodbye as he hung up the phone. Dean stared at the "call ended" notification blinking on his phone before dropping it on the bed and falling backwards, laying on his back with the top of his head settled against Cas' stomach. Cas moved a hand to run through Dean's short hair.

            "I'm sorry, Dean. Perhaps I shouldn't have suggested you stay last night. I was selfish."     Dean shook his head.

            "Cas, no," he said, moving his body around so that he was laying beside the other man. "Last night was great, okay? I'm really glad that I stayed. It was my own fault, I should have set an alarm. I never sleep this late, so I didn't expect to need it." He smiled. "I guess you're not the only one who sleeps better with the right company." Dean felt his stomach jump slightly when Cas returned his smile. The night really had been the best one he'd had in a long time. He'd been grateful to discover that he'd left a pair of sweatpants and a spare t-shirt in his backpack in case he'd decided to go to the gym before heading to Cas' place, and he'd changed into those once he'd agreed to spend the night. They'd watched another movie before making their way almost cautiously to Cas' bed, where they'd cuddled and talked and kissed until they'd fallen asleep. Dean had never really thought of himself as a cuddler, but as he was quickly learning, Cas was. Dean found he was surprisingly okay with that.

            "So…" Cas said slowly.

            "Mmhmm?"

            "Does this mean that you are free today, after all?" Cas asked, almost shyly. Dean's face nearly split in two with his grin.

            "Yeah. I guess it does. Bobby got Benny to cover my shift." Cas smiled.

            "Good," he said, scooting himself closer to Dean and draping an arm over his waist. Dean tensed very slightly for just a moment, still unused to the idea that Cas was his _boyfriend,_ but quickly relaxed and lifted his head to prop it on his hand, leaning forward to kiss Cas softly, eliciting another smile from him.

            "Do you feel like doing anything today?" Cas asked.

            "Not much," Dean said. "Maybe finish off my last grad school application, so I can get it in the mail on Monday."  

            "That's a good idea," Cas replied.

            "But I'd like to hang out with you for awhile, first," Dean said. "I mean, if that's okay. If you have plans or something just let me know. But I do have to go home tonight anyway - I'm opening the shop tomorrow, so I really can't risk oversleeping for that shift. So I can just do it tonight." Dean knew he was babbling, but he couldn't seem to stop himself.

            "Dean," Cas said, effectively shutting the other man up. He smiled. "I have nothing better to do with my day than spend it with you. I have nothing pressing to attend to, and I find very little as enjoyable as spending time with you. Please, stop worrying." He leaned towards Dean again and kissed him. Dean smiled.

            "I'm sorry," Dean said.

            Cas shook his head. "Please, don't be. I know you weren't expecting this to happen, and I do get the sense that you are still uncertain. I hope I will be able to fully earn the trust you are putting in me now." Dean looked down at the bed between them, where Cas had moved his hand from its position around Dean's waist and held his hand instead. Their fingers were intertwined, and Dean squeezed Cas' hand lightly. He looked up again, making eye contact this time.

            "You're really awesome, you know that?" he said. Cas just grinned at him, squeezing his hand again.

*****

            The next few weeks passed by in a blur. Dean spent most weekend nights when he didn't have to work the next day at Cas' place, and Cas made a point of coming in to the shop every time Dean was working. They had quickly fallen into an easy routine, and Dean couldn't remember the last time he'd been this consistently happy, although one thing still nagged at him.

            He still hadn't had the chance to tell his brother.

            They'd spoken only a couple of times since this whole thing with Cas had started, and Dean was starting to worry. He knew Sammy'd be pissed if Dean waited too long to tell him, and yet he couldn't seem to figure out just what to say. The brothers were close, but Dean had never really been one to openly discuss his feelings. He pulled out his phone, staring at the screen blankly as he wondered if he should text Sam or not. Finally setting it down on the library table, message unsent, he turned back to his chemistry equations. Several minutes later, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up, smiling.

            "Hey," he said.

            "Hello, Dean," Cas replied, as he always did.

            "Thought you were working?" Dean asked. They'd decided to try and avoid contact in the library when Cas was working due to a close call when the head librarian had almost caught them making out amongst the book stacks about a week previously. Dean grinned slightly at the memory.

            "I was working the earlier shift today. I'm finished," Cas replied.

            "Oh. I forgot. I'm sorry, Cas. I'm not quite finished up here, yet." Cas smiled.

            "That's alright, Dean. Do you want me to leave and meet you back here when you are finished? I don't want to stay if I'm going to distract you." Dean covered Cas' hand with his own.

            "No. Please stay. I don't need much longer - I've only got this equation plus one more to work out for now. Besides, I haven't gotten to see you much this week. I miss you." Cas glanced around briefly and, after determining that they were very much alone, bent down to kiss Dean briefly.

            "I've missed you too, Dean," he said quietly before sitting in the chair beside him.

            Twenty minutes later, Dean dropped his pencil triumphantly.

            "Done. Let's get out of here," he said. He shut his textbook and binder and shoved them blindly into his bag before zipping it up. Just as he picked up his phone after swinging his backpack over his shoulders, it began to buzz intensely. He looked down at the screen.

            "Ah, one sec, Cas. I'd better get this, it's Sam," he said before sliding his thumb across the screen to accept the call. "Hi, Sammy, what's up?" he asked, grinning as Cas reached out and took his other hand.

            _"Dean, where are you?"_ Sam asked. Dean motioned to Cas that they could start walking while he talked, and they strode towards the door.

            "Uh, school, Sam, where do you think I am?" he asked.

            _"I called your dorm, your roommate said you were at the library?"_

            "Yeah. I'm just leaving, Sam, what's-" his voice suddenly cut off mid-sentence as he and Cas stepped through the door of the library just in time for Dean to see Sam standing directly outside, a look of mild shock on his face as Dean exited the building still holding Cas' hand.

            "Hey, Sammy. What….what are you doing here?" Dean asked, slowly.

            "It's a long weekend. Thought I'd come visit my big brother. I guess I should have called first." Dean couldn't quite place the tone of Sam's voice. It wasn't quite angry, or disappointed, but it wasn't exactly pleased, either.

            "No, no, it's cool, Sam. You know I always want to see you. I'm just, uh, surprised. Um. I guess I should introduce you…Sam, this is Cas. Cas…this is my little brother. Sam."

            Cas let go of Dean's hand and stepped forward. "Hello, Sam. It is nice to meet you. Dean has told me a great deal about you."

            Sam reached forward to shake Cas' hand, but said in a slightly sullen voice, "Hi. Haven't heard anything at all about you."

            Dean's stomach sank. "Sam, don't be like that." Cas shook his head.

            "Dean, it's all right. Evidently you two have things to discuss," He stepped back for a moment to squeeze Dean's hand lightly again. "Call me when you have a chance, okay? I will let you two catch up."

            Dean tugged on Cas' hand lightly, pulling the other man towards him and wrapping him in a tight hug, kissing his ear lightly as he whispered, "I'll call you tonight. I promise."

            "Don't rush, Dean. Whenever you can." Dean released him reluctantly and waved goodbye before turning back to Sam.

            "C'mon, Sam. Let's go get some dinner." Sam looked at Dean suspiciously.

            "Look. You're here for at least tonight anyways. You can't get back to school until tomorrow, there's no trains. You might as well let me buy you dinner and tell you what's going on, okay?" Sam sighed before nodding in agreement.

            "Fine. But you'd better have a good excuse for not telling me about this."

            They went to the cafeteria. It was closest, and the weather was cold. Dean and Cas had been debating when the snow would start. They sat down with their food and ate in silence for several minutes before Dean spoke.

            "Sorry I didn't tell you about Cas sooner. It wasn't intentional. I've just been busy. We haven't exactly talked that much lately, you know." Sam nodded.

            "Yeah, I guess. But I mean, how long has this been going on? We have talked semi-recently."

            Dean stopped to think for a minute. "Well, we met right around midterms. Started dating a week or so later. So I guess it's been about a month." He stopped suddenly at the realisation. It hadn't seemed that long. "It wasn't something I was expecting. Definitely not something I was looking for. And I know we've talked since then, Sammy, and I'm sorry. I just wasn't really sure how to tell you." Sam raised an eyebrow at his brother.

            "Really? 'Hey Sam I met a guy and I think he's pretty cool' is too hard for you to come up with?" he replied sarcastically.

            "Okay, you know what, Sam? Stop being a little bitch. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Cas sooner. I've been busy, you've been busy, can we just get over it?" Dean snapped.  Sam rolled his eyes.

            "Yeah, sure. Fine. It's done." Sam said. "Cas seems nice." He was obviously trying to smooth things over, but his still-grouchy tone grated on Dean's nerves.

            "He is. He's great, Sam, and I'm betting if you'd stop being an ass for three seconds, you'd really  like him. He's a librarian, he's absolutely fucking brilliant, watching him try and talk about pop culture is hilarious because he hasn't got a clue half the time, and he's just…" Dean paused, taking a breath to try and calm his irritation. "He's great, Sam. And I wish you hadn't been such a dick back at the library. I could have made sure you knew about him before you came if I'd known you were coming."

            "Sorry. Though if he's so damn great I would have figured you'd tell me sooner." Sam said shortly. Dean sighed.

            They got back to Dean's dorm not long after that and, putting on a matched set of fake smiles to fool Dean's roommate, put on a movie as soon as they arrived so that they could avoid talking. As soon as the movie was over, Dean went to grab spare blankets and a pillow from his closet and tossed them on the couch for Sam, claiming to need an early night. He went into his bedroom and shut the door, locking it carefully behind him. He shrugged out of his jeans and shirt, leaving his boxers on, and collapsed onto his bed. Picking up his phone off the small dresser at his bedside, he dialled Cas' number.

            " _Hello, Dean_." Cas' familiar gravelly voice was comforting on the other end of the line.

            "Hey, Cas." Dean said wearily. "I'm sorry again about earlier. Sam's going back to school in the morning."

            " _It's fine, Dean. Are you alright?"_ Cas asked. Dean could hear the concern in his voice.

            "I'll be okay. Sam's train is at nine tomorrow. Do you mind if I come over after?" he asked.

            " _Of course not. You know you don't need to ask, Dean. I'll make you breakfast, okay?"_ The corner of Dean's mouth quirked up in a small smile.

            "Thanks, Cas. I think I'm going to try to get some sleep, okay?"

            " _That's a good idea. I'll see you in the morning, Dean."_

"G'night, Cas," Dean said softly before hanging up the phone. Double checking to make sure that he'd set an alarm early enough to get Sam back to the train station on time, Dean reached up and clicked off his lamp before pulling the blankets around his shoulders, missing the feel of Cas' arms pulling him close. 


	7. Chapter 7

The trip to the train station the next morning was quiet, neither brother saying much beyond what was necessary. They hugged uncomfortably as they parted.

            "Text me when you get back?" Dean requested.

            "Yeah, alright," Sam said. His voice was still sullen, but Dean thought he was lightening up. He'd hugged him back, at least.

            "Okay. Well. I'll talk to you later, Sammy."

            "Bye, Dean." Sam said, lifting his duffle bag over his head as he turned to enter the train station.

            Dean drove to Cas' apartment still feeling disappointed. He missed Sam, and he wished they could have hung out for the weekend. He really did want Sam and Cas to get to know each other. He pulled into an open visitor parking spot when he arrived at Cas' apartment and smiled as he approached the front door of the building. He pressed Cas' unit number into the keypad and waited only a second before Cas' voice came through the speaker.

            "Hello," he said.

            "Cas." Dean couldn't keep the smile off his face. "Hey." There was no verbal response, simply the click and buzz of the door unlocking. Dean pulled it open and started upstairs to Cas' apartment.

            He didn't knock when he reached his destination. He stepped inside and, hearing dishes clattering in the kitchen, headed there directly. He found Cas standing beside the stove, pushing bacon around a pan with a spatula. Dean stepped up behind him, wrapping his arms around Cas' waist and pressing a kiss to the back of his neck.

            "Hello, Dean," Cas said as Dean felt the other man relax back into his arms. "Breakfast is almost ready."

            Dean smiled and stepped back after kissing him once more, reaching over the counter to pull a few sheets of paper towel from the roll hanging below a cupboard and laying it on the plate Cas was about to transfer the bacon to. Dean folded the paper towel over the steaming stack, pressing it down to soak up the excess grease as Cas leaned over to open the oven, using a folded dish towel to protect himself from the heat as he pulled out a plate of pancakes he'd obviously placed there to keep warm.

            "You're an angel, you know that?" Dean asked, leaning over to kiss Cas again after he'd set down the plate and closed the oven. Cas smiled as he returned the kiss.

            "Hardly, Dean," he said, but Dean could hear the pleasure in his voice. Cas pulled the paper towel from around the bacon and, balling it up, tossed it in the garbage can before turning to wrap his arms around Dean.

            "Good morning," he said. Dean smiled.

            "Morning," he replied, not fighting the urge to kiss Cas again.

            "Hungry?" Cas asked.

            "Always," Dean grinned, pulling reluctantly from Cas' arms. The two men moved around each other instinctively as they set themselves out food and sat down to eat.

            They didn't talk much until they had finished eating and placed their dishes in the dishwasher. They settled on the couch, stretched out, with Dean sitting between Cas' legs and snuggled against Cas' chest, the two men holding hands as Dean tugged Cas' arms tightly around him.

            "How did it go with your brother yesterday?" Cas asked gently. Dean shrugged.

            "I dunno. He's pissed that I hadn't told him about you yet. But he'll get over it, I'm sure," Dean said. "I'm sorry he was such an ass yesterday. I hope you'll get to meet him properly soon. He really is a good guy."

            "He's your brother, Dean. I'm certain he is wonderful." Cas paused for a moment before continuing, seeming to consider his words carefully. "He…wasn't upset because I'm a man, was he?" His voice was more worried than Dean remembered ever hearing. He twisted his body quickly to face Cas head on.

            "God, Cas no!" he said firmly, running a hand along Cas' cheek as he registered the concern in his boyfriend's eyes.

            "Cas, no. I promise," he said, his voice more calm now. "He's just being snippy because I didn't tell him sooner." He kissed Cas softly. "He's known for years that gender doesn't factor into who I choose to date, Cas. I had my first boyfriend senior year of high school. If he's got a problem with it now, he can fuck right off. But I'm sure he's just cranky. We're close, and we're the only family we've got," Dean said, his voice turning sad. "So, he's grouchy, and maybe he's right to be, I don't know. But he'll get over it. He always does."

            Cas nodded, his features relaxing.

            "Okay," he said. "I hope he accepts it soon, Dean. I hated the look on your face when he was displeased to see us together."

            Dean smiled. "See? Angel. Told you," he said, leaning forward to kiss Cas again. He didn't know when Sam would get over his tantrum - God knew his brother could be a stubborn bastard - but at the moment, with Cas in his arms and his lips moving along Dean's jaw to his neck, he really couldn't bring himself to care.

*****

            "Dean?" Cas asked later that night as they lay in bed. Dean looked up from where his head was laying on Cas' chest and kissed his jaw lightly.

            "Mmmhmmm?" he responded sleepily.

            "I was just thinking about something…I wanted to run it by you."

            "What's that, Angel?" Dean said. He'd started using the nickname jokingly but it seemed to be sticking.

            "Well, Christmas is in about a month…" Cas started.

            "Yes…" Dean said, hoping to encourage Cas to continue.

            "My brothers will be in town. They are not staying here, of course, my apartment is too small. They will be staying at a hotel. But…if you are comfortable with it, of course…I would really like it if you would spend Christmas with us. My brothers can be…" he paused. "Frustrating. But I do want you to meet them."

            Dean felt his heart rate increase. He couldn't figure out why this possibility was making him so nervous.

            "I…gosh, Cas…" he said slowly.

            "Of course, I understand if you already have arrangements with Sam. I just thought that I would offer, because if you are available it would be great. But I do understand if you can't be here." Dean placed a finger over Cas' lips, silencing him.

            "I don't have plans with Sam. He actually told me just shortly before we met that he was going to Mexico with some friends over Christmas. Which I wasn't too happy about, to be honest, but we aren't exactly huge into holidays anyway. I was just going to be kicking around the dorm." He saw Cas' eyes light up. "But I don't know, Cas." he said.  "It's not that I don't want to spend the time with you, or meet your brothers, because I do. But…I get sort of grumpy around holidays. I don't want to bring you down." Cas smiled.

            "Dean, you could never bring me down. I don't want you to do anything you are uncomfortable with, but will you at least consider it?" Dean sighed. He hated saying no to Cas, but he hated holidays, too.

            "I'll think about it," he promised.

            "Thank you, Dean." Cas' face lit up with a smile as Dean moved one hand to the back of his head and pulled him down for a kiss.

*****

            The next three weeks passed by faster than Dean could have imagined. There were final assignments to be turned in and then, the two-week exam period. He didn't see Cas at all, save for the short visits they had when Cas would come in to the shop during Dean's shifts. As Dean stepped out of his last-ever final exam of his undergraduate career into the snowy afternoon, he pulled out his phone.

            _Hey, Angel. I'm done. Call me when you're off work? I miss you._ He was just about to slip the phone back in his pocket when it beeped loudly.

            _I'm finished already. The library closed early since it's the last day. I'm at the coffee shop, come meet me?_  Dean smiled widely and spun around on his heel, heading in the opposite direction he'd been walking in to go to the coffee shop.

            _Be there in less than five minutes_ , he tapped happily into his phone as he walked.

            He reached the shop in record time and found Cas waiting outside, a steaming cup in each hand. Ignoring the cups at first, Dean walked straight up to Cas and wrapped his arms around him tightly. Cas smiled.

            "Hello, Dean," he said happily.

            "Hi." Dean said, kissing Cas briefly before stepping back. "I missed you. Two and a half weeks without seeing you was way too long."

            "I agree. Here," he said, offering Dean one of the cups. "I thought you could use this after your exam." Dean smiled gratefully.

            "Thanks," he said, taking the cup. He took a sip and sighed happily. "Cas, you're too good to me," he said. "I really love how you remember that I like the pumpkin lattes even though I don't usually admit it. But they taste like pie. I can't resist!" He laughed, and the smile on Cas' face widened.

            "Of course I remember, Dean. I'm glad you like it."

            Dean smiled again and leaned forward to kiss Cas again before taking his hand.

            "Let's go. It's really cold, and the snow's getting harder."

*****

            They were curled up together on the couch a few hours later, both of them half-paying attention to the DVD they'd put in, when Dean kissed the top of Cas' head.

            "Hey, Cas?" he said tentatively.

            "Yes, Dean?" Cas asked, looking up at him from where he was leaning on Dean's chest.

            "I was thinking…about Christmas?" He paused, suddenly nervous. "I was…well…I thought maybe I'd take you up on your offer. If it's still open, of course. I'd like to spend Christmas with you and meet your brothers."

            Dean didn't think he'd ever seen such a wide smile on Cas' face as he did when Cas sat bolt upright and then turned to wrap his arms tightly around Dean.

            "Dean, of _course_ the offer is still open, that was never one that would close. I'm so happy, Dean, thank you." Dean smiled broadly despite the nervousness still spinning wildly in his stomach.

            "Anything for you, Angel," he said, surprising himself with the absolute truth behind the words. 


	8. Chapter 8

The two weeks leading up until Christmas passed in a blur involving mainly shopping and decorating. Dean had never really decorated much for the holidays, but it turned out that Cas had enough holiday spirit for both of them. With most of the campus closed for the holidays, other than the dorms and limited service in the cafeteria, neither Dean or Cas were working. They were together almost constantly; Dean usually staying at Cas' place with the exception of a few days when he went back to his dorm so that Sam could visit, having finally forgiven Dean for taking so long to tell him about Cas. Dean had breathed a sigh of relief when Sam called and asked if he could come visit for a few days before he left on his trip, and as he'd expected, Sam and Cas had gotten along very well. Sam was pre-law at his university, and Cas had originally considered law school before deciding to go into library studies, so they found plenty to talk about.

            "Thanks for coming, Sammy." Dean had said gratefully as he hugged his brother goodbye at the train station.

            "I'm glad I did. Cas is a good guy, Dean," Sam said, smiling. "You guys seem really happy." Dean had blushed.

            "We are, Sam. I don't actually remember the last time I was this happy with someone." The corner of Dean's mouth flicked up in an almost-giddy smile that he tried unsuccessfully to fight back. Sam hugged his brother again, laughing.

            "Have a good Christmas, bro. Seems like you'll be busy. I'll call you when I get back."

            "Thanks, Sam. Merry Christmas. Don't get drunk and fall in the ocean."

When Sam had turned away to enter the station, he was laughing.

*****

            "Dean?"

            Dean heard the slightly frantic call from the living room and, setting down the lasagna he was about to slide into the oven, left the kitchen to find out what was happening. He found Cas staring at the window to the right side of the tree, his brow furrowed.

            "What's wrong, Cas?" Dean asked, confused.

            "Do you think I should take the lights off the window? I mean, it's awfully close to the tree, do you think it's too many lights? I'm not sure." Cas' voice was worried. Dean couldn't stop himself from smiling as he stepped closer to Cas and pressed a hand to his shoulder, turning him towards himself before pulling him into his arms.

            "Cas, angel, it looks amazing. Don't worry so much. I know you're nervous about your brothers visiting tonight. But it's gonna be fine, okay?" He ran a hand through Cas' hair before kissing him lightly. Cas leaned on Dean's shoulder for a minute before answering.

            "Yeah. I'm trying to tell myself that. You…don’t know my brothers, is all. Gabe mocks everything openly and Michael…well, he just sort of sits there and judges. Quietly. With disapproval all over his face."

            "I'll be right here, okay? If they start anything, I'll take 'em on." Dean grinned. "It'll be okay, Cas. I promise." He pulled Cas tightly to his chest again. "And hey, after they leave, Santa comes tonight," he winked. "You've gotta be excited about _that_ , at least." Cas looked at him, half-grinning with one eyebrow raised.

            "Dean, Santa Claus doesn't exist."

            Dean let his mouth fall open dramatically and brought one hand around from its place on Cas' back, pressing it to his chest.

            "Cas! I am stunned at this revelation!" he exclaimed. "Shocked! Appalled! How could you say such a thing?"

            Cas laughed. "Oh, stop it, Dean," he said, leaning forward to kiss Dean again, just as the phone beeped, signifying the arrival of someone at the door.

            "Let them up. I'm going to go put the food in the oven, I'll be back to meet them at the door with you." Dean said, his hand brushing over Cas' cheek.

            "No, wait in the living room after you get the lasagna in, please." Cas said. "I appreciate the offer. But I think it'll go better if I meet them myself. They know you're here, but…I think it'll just go more smoothly." Dean nodded.

            "Sure. Whatever you think will help." he replied. "You'd better get that," he said, nodding towards the phone, which was beeping a third time. Cas took a deep breath and picked up the phone, pressing the button to let his brothers upstairs.

*****

            Dean sighed as Cas closed the door behind his brothers.

            "I'm sorry. They were horrible to you, Dean." Cas said quietly, turning to face Dean and leaning against the door.

            "No, Cas, it's fine. They were okay. I promise. Gabe's just…he's something, isn't he?" Dean replied, stepping forward to wrap his arms around Cas' waist. Cas snorted.

            "Yeah, something. That's one way to put it. He was a jerk, making fun of you all night. I mean, I'm used to it, I wasn't surprised by his mocking me, but I figured he might at least pretend to be nice to you."

            "Cas, they're gone now, okay? And you said they're both flying out tomorrow morning. You're done with them for the year. It's okay. I'm fine, and you don't have to deal with them." He smiled. "And now, it's just me, you, and Christmas. Thanks to you, I've got actual Christmas spirit for the first time in…well, longer than I can remember." Cas' gaze was starting to head towards the floor and Dean caught his boyfriend's eyes with his own, using his eyes alone to bring Cas' head back up. "Hey. C'mon. Cheer up for me?" Cas gave him a half-hearted smile.

            "We're getting there," Dean said. "C'mon. Let's try that peppermint hot chocolate we bought." Cas nodded.

            Half an hour later they were curled up on the couch in the mostly-dark living room, empty mugs abandoned to the coffee table. Leaning against Dean already, Cas snuggled into his chest. Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

            "Feel better, angel?" he asked.

            "A little. I still feel badly about the way they treated you though, Dean, I really am sorry."  Cas shook his head.

            "Cas, please. Don't, okay? I love you. I haven't had this good a Christmas in…" he trailed off when he realised what he'd said. He'd realised, recently, that he was falling harder and harder, but he'd never voiced what he suspected, even to himself.

            Until now.

            Cas looked up at him, still cuddled into his chest.

            "I, um. Sorry, Cas. I didn't - I mean, I'm not lying but - I just-" Dean stammered. He was silenced when Cas leaned up and kissed him hard.

            "I love you too, you idiot." Cas mumbled against his mouth.

*****

            Unusually, Dean woke up before Cas did the next morning. Smiling, he carefully disentangled himself from around Cas, tucking the comforter more tightly around him and kissing him lightly on the cheek before sneaking out of the bedroom. He returned a few minutes later, carrying a mug of tea in one hand and a small wrapped present in the other, to find Cas sitting up. Dean smiled.

            "Good morning," he said. Cas blinked sleepily at him.

            "Good morning, Dean," he said.

            "I brought you tea. And your Christmas present," Dean said, offering the mentioned items to Cas, who smiled.

            "Tea first," he said. "Thank you, Dean."

            Dean kissed him lightly as he handed the mug over. "You're welcome. Merry Christmas," he said.

            "Merry Christmas," Cas replied as he took a sip of his tea before setting the mug on the bedside table. "Mm, that's good. Is that the gingerbread one you bought yesterday?" he asked. Dean nodded.

            "It seemed festive."

            Cas grinned. "It's really good. Want some?" he asked.

            "Nah, I'm good. I've got coffee brewing," Dean smiled. "Here," he added, handing Cas the brightly wrapped package. Cas looked at it intently for a moment before opening it carefully. Dean laughed.

            "You know it's okay to rip the paper, right, Cas?" he asked teasingly. Cas just shook his head in response as he pulled a small black rectangle from within the paper. Turning it over, he found a framed photo, one of the few that had been taken of the two of them together. Dean always insisted he hated his picture being taken and usually refused. This one had been taken in the coffee shop one day by Anna, who hadn't taken no for an answer. She'd pushed Dean into Cas' lap on one of the armchairs and instructed Cas to wrap his arms around Dean, who'd sat slightly awkwardly while Cas kissed his cheek.  

            Dean hated to admit it, but he liked the picture. And, he judged from the look on Cas' face, so did he. Cas looked up at him, undisguised love shining out of his eyes.

            "It's perfect, Dean. Thank you." Dean smiled.

            "I'm glad you like it," he said. "I'm really not good at this Christmas thing, and I wasn't sure what you might want, but I know it bugs you that I don't really get my picture taken much…"

            Cas set the picture to the side and leaned forward to wrap his arms around Dean.

            "It's perfect, okay? And you're doing just fine at 'this Christmas thing'," Cas said gently. "Come on. Let's go to the living room so I can give you your gift." He set the frame up on the bedside table and picked up his tea carefully before taking Dean's hand to lead him out of the room.

            Forty-five minutes, several kisses, and a few unwrapped classic rock albums on vinyl later, Dean and Cas were standing in the kitchen making breakfast. Dean flipped the last piece of French toast on to the plate sitting next to the stove and clicked off the burner, turning to face Cas who'd just put the carton of juice back in the fridge.

            "Hungry?" Dean asked.

            "Very," Cas replied, picking up the two glasses of juice and heading out of the kitchen to the living room. Dean followed close behind carrying plates of food.

*****

            They passed the rest of the day in relative quiet, watching Christmas specials on TV and enjoying each other's company. After dinner, Dean spoke up.

            "Hey, Cas?" he asked.

            "Yes, Dean?"

            "It's snowing…it's really nice out. You want to go walk in the park? I know you liked looking at the lights when we went last week."

            Cas smiled. "I'd love to, Dean."

            They got ready quickly and headed out. The park was only half a block from Cas' apartment, so they reached the beautifully lit walking paths very shortly. They stopped at the entrance, taking in the many trees wrapped in brightly-coloured lights. Tugging on Cas' hand, Dean pulled him into his arms and held him, smiling at the look of joy on his boyfriend's face.

            "Merry Christmas, Cas," he said.

            "Merry Christmas, Dean," Cas replied, turning away from the trees to lean forward and kiss him. 


	9. Chapter 9

"You'll come, right, Cas?" Dean's voice was concerned.

            "Do you want me to?" Cas asked him.

            "Are you crazy?" Dean asked. "Cas, of course I want you there when I graduate." It was two weeks into January and Dean had just received his tickets for the graduation ceremony.

            "Cas," he said, more gently this time. "Please come. I can't imagine graduating without you there." His voice went very quiet as a thought hit him. "I mean, as long as you want to. As long as you're comfortable with it." He dropped his eyes. "I forget sometimes that we've only been together a few months. It feels like it's been much longer - in the best ways, of course - at least to me, and I just want you there. For all the important things. I forget that you might not be as excited as me to be really public-"

            "Dean,"  Cas said, cutting him off. Dean looked up. "Stop. Please. You misunderstand me. I want to be there. Of course I do. I just thought you might want to save your tickets for your family, maybe Bobby, people who have known you longer." He pulled Dean closer to him on the couch, smiling when Dean curled into his side.

            "I've got two tickets, and Sam's my only family," Dean said. "And Bobby's great, but he's just my boss. I'd rather have you there any day." He ran a hand over the light stubble on Cas' jaw.

            "So you'll come, then?" he asked. Cas smiled.

            "Of course, Dean," he said, bending his head to kiss the younger man.

*****

            "Fine, Sammy," Dean said irritably.

            " _You sure, Dean?"_ Sam's voice from the other end of the phone was concerned.

            "Yeah, fine. Not like there's anything that can be done. I'll see you next weekend." Dean replied. "I gotta go. Talk to you later." Dean hung up the phone and fell onto his back on the bed, dropping his cell beside him. He lay there, staring at the ceiling sullenly for several minutes when his phone rang. Picking it up, he glanced at the screen before accepting the call.

            "Hey, Cas," he said.

            " _Are you alright, Dean?"_

            "Not really. I'm just being stupid, though. Come over? I don't really feel like going anywhere."

            " _You're never stupid, Dean. I'll be right over. Do you want anything?"_ Cas offered.

            "No. Just you." Dean said, not caring how cheesy he sounded.

            "I'll be there in ten minutes," Cas said before hanging up.

            Ten minutes later on the nose, Dean heard a knock on the main door of his dorm. Sliding off his bed and leaving his room, he opened the door to let Cas in. As he stepped inside, pulling off his trenchcoat, Dean could see Cas taking in his appearance. Dean realised he probably looked a mess - half naked, plaid pyjama bottoms slung low on his hips, hair mussed - since, between waking up with a nasty cold developing and then his upsetting conversation with Sam, he'd spent most of the day in bed.

            "Sorry. I know I’m a bit of a disaster," Dean apologised.

            "That was not what I was going to say," Cas said, as he stepped forward to wrap his arms around Dean. "What's wrong?"

            "Bad day," Dean said, accepting the embrace before stepping back and taking Cas' hand, leading him into his bedroom and shutting the door before sitting on the bed, leaning against the headboard and sighing.

            "What happened, Dean?" Cas asked again.

            "Woke up feeling like crap, so I called in sick to work for the first time ever because my nose is dripping everywhere. Lay around most of the day feeling sorry for myself and then Sam calls and says he can't come to my graduation ceremony because he had a fucking exam that got rescheduled. I know it's not his fault, but…" Dean trailed off. Cas settled back against the headboard as well and Dean lay his head on Cas' chest. "Like I said. I'm being stupid. Sam can't control it and his exam is important. It's just a day for me." Cas ran his fingers through Dean's hair slowly.

            "You're not being stupid, Dean, of course you're disappointed. You wanted your brother there when you got your degree. It's understandable."

            "I was a dick to him on the phone when he told me. I got really bitchy. I feel bad."

            Cas leaned over to kiss the top of Dean's head softly. "You'll call him later and apologise. Sam won't mind, I'm sure. He'll understand, Dean." Cas paused for a minute. "Have you eaten anything today?" Dean shook his head.

            "Not really. Haven't been hungry. Felt too crappy." Cas hugged him gently.

            "I'm going to go get you some soup and tea. I'll bring it back and we'll have dinner together, okay? I want you to stay in bed, though."

            "Cas, I'm really not-" Dean started.

            "Dean, you need to eat. I'll get you that tomato rice soup you like from the diner, okay?" Cas said, cutting him off. Dean sighed, recognising the futility of arguing with his boyfriend.

            "Okay." Cas smiled and dropped a kiss on the top of his head before scooting off the bed.

            "I'll be back soon," he said.

            "Thanks, angel," Dean said quietly. "Grab my key, okay? You can let yourself in when you get back." Cas nodded.

            "I'll be back in 20 minutes," Cas said as he left Dean's bedroom, closing the door softly behind him.

*****

            In the waiting room below the auditorium, Dean adjusted his blue tie nervously one last time before pulling his black graduation gown overtop of his suit. As he tugged it down over his head, his phone beeped in the pocket of his dress pants. He pulled it off and quickly clicked it into silent mode before checking the message.

            _I'm here. Can`t wait to see you. So proud of you, Dean. Love you._

Dean grinned as he read the message, swallowing the lump growing in his throat.

 _Look for me on stage,_ he typed quickly. _I'll be the one in the stupid hat._

He stuffed his phone back in his pocket and straightened the gown again, tugging the always-unflattering graduation cap onto his head before hurrying to find his spot in the lineup.

*****

            The auditorium foyer was packed with graduates and their families when Dean finally squeezed out of the theatre. He scanned the crowd quickly, looking for the familiar sweep of a tan trenchcoat. Feeling his phone vibrating in his pocket, he pulled it out.

            _It's crazy in there. Meet me just outside the doors?_

Dean smiled, thankful to get out of the crush of people. When he stepped outside, it was still crowded, but there was at least air and more than three milimetres between people. He looked through the crowd carefully, still not seeing Cas' distinctive coat. Suddenly, there was a tap on his shoulder.

            "I'm not _that_ hard to find, am I?" Cas' voice came from behind him.

            "It's crowded, gimme a-" Dean started, cutting himself off abruptly when he saw Cas. He'd abandoned his usual trenchcoat and blue tie in favour of a dressier outfit. He'd put on a black vest over a dark grey shirt, and chosen a bright red tie to stand out amongst the more neutral colours of the rest of his outfit. Dean shifted slightly, thankful he was still wearing the loose graduation gown.

            "Crap, Cas," Dean choked out. "You look fucking amazing." Cas smiled slightly shyly.

            "Wanted to look nice. It's an important day," he said, pulling Dean into his arms. "Congratulations, Dean. You looked great up there." Dean grinned widely before cupping Cas' face in his hands and kissing him hard.

            "Thanks for being here, angel." he said.

            "I wouldn't be anywhere else," Cas replied, sliding his hands down Dean's arms to take his hands. "Let's go get rid of the graduation gown, okay? We're going to go out for dinner and celebrate." Dean smiled.

            "Sounds great, Cas," he said.

*****

            Later that night, Dean and Cas were laying on the couch in Cas' apartment. Dean was laying on Cas' chest, and Cas had his arms wrapped tightly around him. They had a movie on, but neither of them was paying much attention as they cuddled, every now and then kissing slowly and lazily.

            "Hey Cas?" Dean said sleepily, tracing patterns along Cas' chest with his index finger.

            "Mmmhmm?" Cas mumbled, clearly dozing off.

            "You really do look fucking amazing in this outfit." Cas chuckled.

            "Thank you, Dean," he said.

            "Miss your trenchcoat, though." Dean turned his head slightly to press a kiss to Cas' shirt.

            "It'll be back tomorrow," Cas said, holding Dean tighter. "C'mon, let's go to bed." he said, squeezing Dean's shoulder lightly. Dean looked up at him, resting his chin on Cas' chest.

            "You coming on to me?" he teased.

            "Do you want me to?" Cas said, laughter in his eyes.

            "Keep looking at me like that…" Dean said, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. Cas laughed.

            "You are ridiculous Dean, you know that?" Dean leaned his head forward to kiss Cas briefly before leveraging himself up by pressing his palms into Cas' chest and rotating around to be able to slide off the edge of the couch.

            "Maybe. But I just graduated with honours and you love me even if I am ridiculous," Dean said with a smirk as he sauntered towards Cas' bedroom. Cas smiled and stretched, hitting the power button on the TV remote as he stood up to follow Dean.

            "I do at that," he said. 


	10. Chapter 10

"You hear back from those grad schools you applied to yet, Dean?" Bobby asked. It was a slow day at the coffee shop, since most of the students were away for March break. Dean had picked up full time hours during the semester, since he wasn't in classes anymore.

            "Well, I only applied to one. But no, I haven't heard back yet." He hated to admit it, but he was starting to get nervous. He'd always just expected he would go to grad school, so he had no idea what would happen if he didn't get in.

            "Ah, well, I'm sure it's just bureaucracy crap," Bobby said. "You were nearly top of your class, you'll get in, Dean." Dean forced a smile and nodded.

            "I hope so. Thanks, Bobby," he said, trying to keep his voice hopeful.

            "I just call it like I see it," Bobby replied. His eyes flickered towards the door. "Hm. Someone's comin' in. I'm just gonna go into the back. Gimme a call if you get a rush or anything." With that, Bobby was gone. Dean looked up as the bell above the door rang and grinned.

            "Hey, angel. You done for the day?" he asked as Cas stepped towards the counter. The shop was empty, so he leaned over the counter to kiss him briefly. Cas smiled as Dean stepped back and started moving around behind the counter, getting tea ready for him.

            "Yes, I'm finished. It was very quiet in the library with so many people gone for the break."

            "Yeah, it's been quiet around here, too." Dean said. "You wanna hang around for an hour until I'm off shift? We could get some food and then go back to my place." Despite no longer being a student, Dean was still living in the dorms. He'd known he would be graduating after the fall semester, but with the prospect of moving for grad school looming, he'd opted to pay for the full academic year in the dorm so he didn't have to worry about finding an apartment to rent for just a few months before he moved again. Cas smiled.

            "Of course," he said, taking the mug that Dean slid across the counter and leaning across to kiss him once more before turning to find a spot to sit.

            "Hey Cas?" Dean asked a couple of hours later as they sat on the couch, his back leaning against Cas' side.

            "Yes, Dean?" Cas replied. Dean took a deep breath.

            "What am I gonna do if I don't get into grad school?" he asked, his voice worried.

            "Dean, you'll get in. Of course you will," Cas said, twisting his body to wrap his arms around Dean. "Your grades were incredible. They'd be out of their minds not to accept you." Dean settled back into Cas' arms.

            "I didn't have a lot of extracurriculars or anything, though, and the program is really competitive."

            Cas kissed his neck. "It'll be fine, Dean," he said before moving up to kiss just below his ear. "Believe me. Everything will be fine." Dean tilted his head to the side, exposing more of his neck to Cas, who took full advantage of the opening. Dean smiled.

            "I hope so…" he mumbled before letting himself focus on nothing but the feel of Cas' lips on his skin.

*****

            _Sorry, Dean,_ the text flashing across his screen read. _My appointment was late, so my errands are running long. Meet me at my place at seven?_

            Dean's face fell. _Yeah, okay. See you then,_ he typed quickly as he stepped out of the coffee shop and turned towards his dorm. It was probably better anyway, he thought, since this way he could check his mail before heading over to Cas'. It was the second week of April; he figured he should hear one way or another from the school any day now. He walked quickly across the campus, grateful for the finally-warming spring air. Reaching his dorm, he pulled out his key and opened his mailbox in the hall, half-expecting it to be empty again.

            It wasn't.

            He grabbed the envelope, uncertain how to judge its size, and headed to his dorm apartment, heart pounding in his chest. He opened the apartment door and found his roommate sprawled out on the couch, watching some kind of sports game on the TV.

            "Hey, Dean. Thought you were heading to Cas' place tonight."

            "Yeah, I am in a bit, Derek. He got held up. Good game?" he asked.

            "Shitty. We're losing." Derek said grumpily.

            "Sorry to hear that, dude," Dean said in a bored voice before heading into his bedroom and shutting the door. He sat on his bed and fingered the envelope in his hands, eyeing the university logo in the corner. He took a deep breath and started to tug at the flap, ripping it open carefully. He pulled out the first piece of paper that he found.

           

            _Dear Mr. Winchester,_

_Thank you for your interest in our program. At this time we must regretfully inform you…_

 

            The paper fluttered to the ground as Dean dropped it, falling backwards onto the bed and covering his face with his hands.

            "Fuck." he said quietly, unable to keep the tears from springing to his eyes.

*****

            Dean's phone started vibrating on the bed beside him for the fourth time in an hour. He picked it up and looked at the screen, already knowing what he'd see there. Seeing Cas' name flashing on the screen, he dropped the phone beside him again, his stomach churning. He knew he was supposed to have been at Cas' place an hour and a half ago, and that Cas was probably worried sick, but he couldn't bring himself to face his boyfriend right then. His boyfriend, who'd had nothing but faith in him, had tutored him, had encouraged him endlessly.

            And Dean had, as always, managed to disappoint him anyway.

            He waited for the phone to finish vibrating and picked it up, tapping out a short message.

            _Can't make it tonight after all. Sorry._

            He dropped the phone again, only to feel it alert him to a return message seconds later.

            _Are you okay? I've been trying to call._

            Dean sighed before replying.

            _I can't right now, Cas. Sorry._   He sent the message and, adjusting the settings on his phone so that it would no longer vibrate when a message came through, dropped it on his bedside table and buried his face into his pillow, trying to decide how he was going to break the news to Cas that he was a failure, and feeling thankful for the small blessing that he had the next three days off work.

*****

            Dean was woken from sleep by a hand rubbing his back. He opened his eyes slowly and then quickly jerked upright.

            "Cas!" he exclaimed. "What are - how did you - I -" he stammered.

            "Derek let me in. You haven't been returning my calls. I haven't heard from you in two days, Dean. I've been worried." Dean's eyes fell.

            "I'm sorry," he mumbled.

            "Don't be sorry, Dean, talk to me. What's going on? Did…" Cas paused, his voice catching. "Did I do something? Are you angry with me about something?" Dean's eyes shot up.

            "What? Cas! No!" he said emphatically.

            "Then what, Dean? You haven't responded to my calls or messages…I've tried to be patient but I was concerned something was wrong. And, upon arriving here, I see I was right to be concerned." Dean's gaze fell to his lap again.

            "I'm sorry. I didn't want to worry you. I just…I couldn't. I couldn't face you.  I fucked up, Cas," Dean said, mentally kicking himself when he felt a few tears start to fall. Cas pulled him into his arms, and Dean pressed his face into Cas' shoulder as Cas rubbed his back.

            "Dean, what's happened? There's nothing you could've done…nothing…that you would have to avoid me. Do you hear me?" Cas voice whispered in his ear. "I love you, Dean. Talk to me. Please." Dean clung to Cas tightly.

            "I didn't get in," he whispered against Cas' shoulder. "I did something to fuck up my application, Cas, I didn't get into the program. I don't know what I'm going to do." Cas moved his hands from Dean's back to his shoulders and pushed him back slightly so that he could look him in the eyes.

            "Dean. _That_ is why you've been avoiding me for the past two days?" Cas asked incredulously. Dean nodded, his face flushing.

            "I feel like such a failure, Cas. I couldn't face you. You went to grad school. You've done everything, and now you're doing what you love. Me? I had no plans other than grad school. Nothing. And now I'm not in. And I have to move out of the dorm next month and I don't have an apartment and I don't know what I'm going to do." Cas pulled him tightly to his chest again.

            "Dean, the only thing that I might even vaguely be upset about here is that you didn't tell me right away," Cas said. "I would hope that you would trust me a little more than to think I would abandon you or think less of you because of something like this. I love you, Dean. All the time. Not when things are perfect. All the time." he shook his head and chuckled softly. "And honestly, this isn't even that much of a situation," he said. "Selfishly, I might even be a little bit glad." Dean sat up, rubbing at his cheeks urgently.

            "Glad?" he asked, confusion evident on his face.

            "Well you know, I wasn't exactly looking forward to you moving across the country," Cas said, grinning. Dean couldn't help but smile at that, but the smile faded almost as quickly as it had appeared.

            "But what am I going to do, Cas?" he asked, quiet desperation in his voice.

            "Dean, is Bobby going to fire you if you don't leave of your own accord to go to grad school?" Cas replied. Dean blinked at him.

            "Well, no. I mean, other than Bobby nobody knows how to run the store like I do. But what's that-" Dean started to say.

            "Okay. So you have a job. Not one you want for the rest of your life, I'm sure, unless you want to take over running it one day, which I think you would be great at, by the way, but that's not the point here. You have a job. You can always apply to other grad schools, or jobs related to the degree you already have." Cas said.

            "What about a place to live?" Dean said. "The semester ends next month, which means I have to be out of here by then. I'm only paid up until the end of the spring semester." Cas looked at him with one eyebrow raised.

            "Dean. Are you honestly asking me this?" Cas said.

            "Of course I am, Cas."

            "I'm almost offended. I'll chalk it up to your upset state of mind right at the moment," Cas said. "Dean, you ridiculous, beautiful man. You're brilliant, you really are, but sometimes you're really dense, too." He leaned forward to kiss Dean softly before continuing. "Dean. I've been meaning to ask you this for awhile anyway. Why don't you…" he trailed off and took a deep breath, seemingly nervous all of a sudden.

            "Why don't I…." Dean prompted.

            "Move in with me. You're at my apartment half the time anyway. And it _works,_ Dean. We work. Move in with me. Stay on at Bobby's until you work out your next move. Stay with me." Cas said, his voice taking on a pleading note. "Don't think of this as a setback. Think of it as not moving half a country away from me."

            Dean blinked back the fresh onslaught of tears that was threatening to spill from his eyes as he leaned forward and wrapped his arms tightly around Cas' neck.

            "Should…I take that as a yes, then?" Cas asked, his voice still holding a note of uncertainty. Dean's only response was laughter as he kissed Cas hard.

*****

            "This place is great," Sam said, looking around Dean and Cas' apartment. His semester had ended and he'd come to visit for a few days before the summer term started, having decided to take courses through the summer in an attempt to finish his degree sooner. Dean grinned.

            "Thanks, Sammy."

            "I'm sorry you didn't get into your program, Dean. I know it meant a lot to you." His brother's voice was cautious as he broached the topic.

            "It did," Dean said, smiling as he felt Cas arms wrap around his waist from behind him. "But the alternative's not so bad. In fact…" Dean trailed off, not sure if he wanted to complete the cheesy thought that had come to his mind.

            "In fact…." Sam said, trying to get him to continue.

            _Fuck it,_ Dean thought, wrapping his hands around Cas' wrists and squeezing lightly. "In fact, little bro, I'm pretty sure that being here is about the closest to heaven someone like me is ever going to get." He laughed as Sam slammed his face against his palm, groaning about cheesy lines, and turned his head to kiss Cas.

            He didn't really know what was coming, but in that moment, it didn't seem to matter.

 

**End.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...that's that! Thanks for sticking it out with me. This is by far the longest story I've ever written. I really hope you enjoyed it. Thanks for all of your kudos and kind words, they mean SO much more than I can ever express.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from the Goo Goo Dolls song "Iris". Also, my first AU of any sort, so any feedback is greatly appreciated.


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